Ego Death and Sensible Shoes

Today I experienced what I can only describe as an out of body mystical transcendental ego-killing experience. I thought to myself: what is this self I am thinking to? If I am not myself then who or what is I? I was suddenly detached from my own self in the most exhilarating, liberating way and all my anxieties and insecurities vanished. Then I went to Clark's and bought some sensible shoes - not for myself but for my feet.

Hounslow Gray saves the day

Hounslow Gray, semi-famous explorer and environmentalist extraordinaire
Convinces the balding polar bear
Who's down in the mouth
About extinction
To move down south
To avoid extinction

The ice caps melt, the sea level rises
As Hounslow Gray surmises
It's a bloody disaster
There's no happily ever after

But the polar bear doesn't care
Or even give a toss
He's now living in Brent Cross
Having an affair with his boss
And lamenting the loss
Of his hair